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Lighthouse

by Jane Migraine

supported by
vlxlu
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vlxlu first started listening lighthouse in 2021, teenage-hood is nearly over, but this album makes it feel like it’ll last forever <3
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1.
June 03:27
we're adults now at least mostly, legally and you've moved on now to other worlds and things it seems remember when we thought our senior year was cursed didn't know that things could get a whole lot worse i'll remember you on a sidewalk in june barely raining, barely graduated in a cap and gown, your father was talking too loud he was just proud and i was still believing that you would stick around oh last year it seemed that we would be just fine but i'm the only one in my home town tonight parking lots are lost and years have passed despite the fact that im still missing my june life
2.
Hockey Hair 03:50
i wish i were rich so i could buy you pretty things, cause i know i am not often enough, me and my body i wish i could knit you socks and sweaters from home, i wish you weren't so in love with leaving and being alone hockey hair i need you more than i need air oh you're overgrowing cigarette world is my curse to bear and i'd give you my liver but mine is just as bad and i'd try to cheer you up but you know i am just as sad if you said come over i'd just hop on my bike and i'd ride miles and miles working up an appetite but you never do cause you're a gorgan slayer, cowboy killer, football player dude and i can't blame you oh i'll never blame you oh i'll never leave you no i don't wanna go i don't wanna go please just let me hold you close hockey hair i need you more than i need air oh you're overgrowing cigarette world is my curse to bear and i'd give you my liver but mine is just as bad and i'd try to cheer you up but you know i am just as sad hockey hair i love you inside out and right side up again i don't care what your father said to you when you were a kid and i wanna feel the hook of your nose dig into my skin you don't know how bad it gets i miss you so much that i feel sick
3.
you said that if rocky can do it, then you can now you've just got nerve damage in your right hand every boxing movie is the same and that's okay cause now you've got parts of your body that don't feel pain you grew up too fast there's nothing that we can do about that now, oh getting black out drunk won't get you all of those years back why is your cheek bruised in every photo of you? why are you so sad? god i hate your dad how long are you gonna live below the belt? how long until you tell me how you felt? how long are you gonna white knuckle it? oh how long am i gonna have to watch you fall to bits? fall to bits fall to bits fall to bits fall to bits fall to bits
4.
i'm so rough around the edges but you turn me to mush ferris though sits next to you, i've never liked him very much you make my whole world go round, when you stand up i just fall down cause the boys weren't the only ones who adored your long hair the most, sloane do you know what you do? do you know what you do? in the best way, breaking me in two do you know what you do? do you know what you do? oh sloane, i wanna be with you don't wanna watch how you love from afar in my car in the parking lot the big shot casanova meatheads vie for your heart oh sloane i don't believe in god, but you're the closest thing to heaven by far i think that you deserve better, i think that we would be better together do you know what you do? do you know what you do? in the best way, breaking me in two do you know what you do? do you know what you do? oh sloane, i wanna be with you do you know what you do? do you know what you do? in the best way, breaking me in two do you know what you do? do you know what you do? oh sloane, i'm so in love with you
5.
Frat Party 03:44
i'm not sure if i'm mature or if i am just a prude and a bore cause i don't like nights like tonight i wanna stay in i'm just fine i know i said i would go i only said that because i'm afraid of saying no i know that's not fair of me to do to you so maybe i will apologize every time and go with you to that frat party if you like i know you know the whole time i will just be your shadow too stiff to have fun too scared to get drunk i know i know i know you know x12 they called me a bad name in front of you it was some ill-rehearsed, quite vulgar, sexual bit and you were too high to say anything but not high enough to forget
6.
Logan 03:36
you could break your collarbone it'll heal naturally and i'll let you watch as i throw out all of my short sleeves you could let the water run, run pink don't you worry baby, to them we'll always be freaks you could take your hand and put it in a fist and you could lay it on my chest and give my heart a quick kiss you could take it out all on me i would bear any pain just to not be weak logan, do you think i'm strong? you're opinion's the only i want logan, wanna fight like you do do you think you can show me to? i kinda wanna run, but i kinda wanna bleed i know more about first aid than you might think and i know that's messed up, but i think that i'll always be that's why i need you and a good right hook to give me some peace, oh logan, maybe i need my love to hurt cause i got clean but you know i still feel the need to hurt myself first logan, will this feeling ever die? or will it always end in a fight? logan x12 i wanna be strong i wanna be strong i wanna be someone that you can count on i wanna be strong i wanna be strong i wanna be someone that i can count on
7.
Venus 04:21
sipping lemonade, and you look good in a tux and i wanna say hi, but i'm afraid i'd say too much standing by the wall, pondering death and such wanting you to look at me, wanting to know how you touch but there you are dancing in her arms every second that you stay makes me wanna fall apart but there you are oh my lungs, my love, my heart oh they said tonight that venus is brighter than the stars i want i want i want and i want you i want i want i want and i want you i want i want i want and i want you i want i want i want and i want you i can imagine you kissing but i can't imagine that i'm the one who is kissing you back and you know that i'd give everything to you but clearly that's not even enough to tempt you but there you are dancing in her arms every second that you stay makes me wanna fall apart but there you are oh my lungs, my love, my heart oh they said tonight that venus is brighter than the stars i want i want i want and i want you i want i want i want and i want you (and i miss you and i need you and i know that i will never not love you) i want i want i want and i want you (and i miss you and i need you and i know that i will never not love you) i want i want i want and i want you (and i miss you and i need you and i know that i will never not love you)
8.
Muscle Shirt 04:46
i'm not cool but i'm not hot can't melt the metal that's around you're heart but i'll try every time, why don't you stay in my bedroom tonight? but we've done this too many times i'm done with all of the lies love me casually, love me absentmindedly cause if you think too much i know you'd leave love me casually, or do all these years mean nothing? hold me in your arms i'll hold you in mine too and afterwards i'll hope to god that it'll leave a bruise so go put on your muscle shirt break all the rules i've seen too much of your skin to not love you i want you blue-jeaned and bare feet hardwood floors, you and i, we'd grow old we could hate mondays together and keep a spare bedroom for your mother cmon we've done this so many times we can do this if you like love me casually, love me absentmindedly cause if you think too much i know you'd leave love me casually, love me like i need you do you need me? hold me in your arms i'll hold you in mine too and afterwards i'll hope to god that it'll leave a bruise so go put on your muscle shirt break all the rules i've seen too much of your skin to not love you
9.
Killer 05:10
come home to me and let me strip away your pain like paint baby take off your clothes i'll draw a bath i'll whisper pretty things in your ear til you come back i'll cook a steak medium rare we'll have a candlelit-dinner-table meal my dear i'll let the dishes run just like you do and we'll watch television to see if they know it's you cause you're a killer you've always been and i'm no better because i always play the victim oh you're him the righteous man cause you come home covered in blood with a gun in your hand cause your a killer you've always been and i'm no better because i wanna be your victim

about

while recording this project, i realized that most of these songs (8/9!) were about the same person. i realized that these songs, and all the songs that came before, were my way of reaching my arms out as far as they go without actually touching, calling out without actually saying anything. i felt like a lighthouse, pleading for the ships (one specific ship) to come back. these songs are all about trying to figure that out. trying to figure out if it's better to speak or not, to move on or stay, to press pause or play.

a lighthouse cannot move. all it can do is give its life to the sea and hope the ships choose to return on their own.

:)

credits

released November 13, 2020

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Jane Migraine Richmond, Virginia

yearn rock

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